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I am a woman who has endured much over the years, most recently, divorce, a child with depression, a newly recognized eating disorder, another child with autism and ADHD, financial hardship and professional struggle.
My separation was 7 years ago and it came as a total and complete shock. My husband and I had two amazing children and had been together since high school. We had been unhappy for a long time and despite efforts to make it work, one day he looked at me and told me it was over.
I was full of anger, resentment, fear and pain. It took many years, mistakes and too much time and money before I was able to breathe again.
The thing I had turned myself inside out for was ripped away from me and there was nothing I could do to get it back. Everything, it seemed, was out of my control and when I looked in the mirror, I no longer saw myself.
A few years later came the divorce, which was ugly, lengthy and expensive. I tried to manage on my own for a few years and just ended up deeper and deeper in debt and feeling more lost than ever.
My parents offered to have me move in with them. My plan was to pay off my debt and save a down payment for a home of my own. I've been able to pay down the debt however, due to unexpected medical bills and life's inevitable bumps in the road, I don't have enough to purchase a home. I had to decide if I would stay longer or move on, on my own.
I have decided to move on and have secured a cute little place with lots of character in a great neighborhood with a great landlord.
Since making the decision to move, I have had this overwhelming feeling of renewal, sometimes so strong that I can't focus on anything but the move and beginning my new life.
I decided to write this blog to chronicle my journey and to
help me to get to know the new/old me again.
I was once a very passionate, vibrant, no nonsense person who stood up for what she believed. I miss that and am excited to get reacquainted with myself, and begin again.
